My Sister's Keeper .

For Friday, September 17, 2010.

The importance of life is life itself.  Many people have their opinions on life and often struggle to keep sane.  I agree with that.  Life is a challenge and everyday you are faced with a struggle; but you was not born solo.  You are suppose to have family.  Family is there to give you 100% support, they are your backbone.  Unfortunitely- not everyone has a family to rely on, talk to, or even share anything with.  This is why I am thankful to have a family; my family.  But of all people in it, I look up to my sister and enjoy living for my niece.

This is my sister, my twin, my other personality, my everything; all in all.  She’s the reason I’m still breathing this air on planet earth today.  I swear she is my knight in shining armor :D , my worst enemy when I’m mad, my counsler when I’m in a bind. She is my lifesaver.  She was the one who actually stopped me from meeting end's meet and as bad as it may sound, we both have tried until we stopped and come to face that it would only make the situation worse.  Well now she has multiple reasons to live.  The blessing God gave us as a daughter & a niece; Lisa Marie Flemming.  My sister is the strongest woman alive to be so young.  I wouldn’t trade her in for the world.  Yes, of course we have our fights, our arguenments and disagreements like the time we were arguing and I said I was going to give her a black eye and of course she threatened to spit on me which caused a big ruckus - jeeze.  But shes my blood.  Same father, different mother (: 

I remember when I first watched My Sister’s Keeper... I honestly broke down because I couldn’t imagine that being my sister dying and her asking me to stop helping.  I would kill myself after she'd passed because I wouldn’t be able to survive knowning that my sister is gone for good not to never come back :/.  I am my Sister’s Keeper, whether she likes it or not.  She is everything to me and my worst fear in life would be to lose the girl who is the other half of my smile, the joy in my laughter, and the blood that pumps through my heart.  She is Rhonda Marie Flemming-Caldwell. <33 My Big Sister.

My neice, Lisaaaaaaa <3

Trust Is Like A Mirror...

You Can Fix It If It's Broken, But You Can Still See The Crack In The Person's Reflection!

Friday, September 10, 2010

Remember when you was little and nothing really mattered because all you wanted to to was have fun? Remember when you was never affected by a little lie someone has told you, but you was always told to tell the truth because there were always consequences? Remember when boys use to have germs and girls use to have cuties? Those were really the best times. Now, it's like the opposite. You continue to let little things bother you and when you get told a lie, it either makes you upset or furious. Lies get told, but no one seems to let them go- so more lies get spread. I know that lying is sometimes necessary & often the best thing to do in order to avoid a situation that you do not want to be involved in. I also know that lying is a good. Some lies are so little and meaningless that they cause no one harm and make no difference to anyone or anything. But what about the lies that DO matter? The lies that DO make a difference? The lies and secrets that hurt yourself or other people, whether or not they hurt someone you hate or someone you love? Whether or not the lies had hurt someone you've never met or someone you've only seen from a distance. What about the lies that start small, but like the snowball effect- get bigger and bigger, gaining speed and potential to hurt? Lies that change someone's life for the bad or lies that lead to physical harm or death? That's all that seems to happen now days. Some people don't realize what they say or do does have an effect on others. Personally, I think that lying is the most deceiving thing that anyone can do. Secrets and lies have the power to destroy a life or create a new one.

Now days, I feel like I am constantly lied to everyday by the people I love and by the people I care for most. I'm lied to by people I don't even know and by people I have just met. It seems that secrets are kept without my knowledge, hidden thoughts or feelings. They can be fact or they can be opinion; things I will never know and things I will soon find out.

This is the reason why I keep things to myself. I don't trust many people anymore and I only hang out with the ones that I do. I've lost many friendships and relationships because of lies. Some big, some small; sometimes both. But I'm still standing with my head up and those lost friendships and past relationships, I've learned that you can't trust anyone and when it comes down to it, you can only confide in yourself. But if is so happen to ask and when I ask you what I am to you- I want to know what I am to you. If I am nothing then I will be nothing. If I am everything then I will be everything. I could be a friend or so much more, but either way, when I ask you what I am to you, don't lie. No matter what your answer is, I will still continue to have a smile on my face!

Doll Face .

This past Tuesday in Mr. Mann's class, we had watched this video on teacher tube called "Doll Face".  I can say this one of the most interesting videos that I have ever seen in my life.  At first when the video was played, it seemed to look as if it was a scary, kinda creepy clip- but as the video played, it had more of a sad vibe to it than scary.  After I watched Doll Face, I asked myself why was this video made & when I thought about it, I realized it was posted to send a message or messages to everyone in the world who doesn't appreciate the way they looked.

The first message that I had came up with was that when people watch T.V. & see all the beautiful, famous people on it- it makes them want to change their image.  I believe this message was encouraged in the video because even if you tryed real hard to change who you are, your still not going to be happy in the end.  Your self-esteem had completely dropped & it began to drop as soon as you realized that you, yourself, thought you wasn't that good enough.  Doll Face had seen a beautfiul face on the television & started to beautify itself to look like that exact image.  Then as soon as Doll Face would think their make-up is perfect, the T.V. would go further back up into the air & since Doll Face is actually like a jack-in-the-box, it can only go so far.  Because it tried so hard to change, it had broke & the fake beauty had shattered.

Another message that I had gotten from the video was to be yourself.  Be yourself because noone else can be you for you.  I feel confidence is key & without it, your not going to be happy with anything you do in life.  Who cares if others think different of you or if they sit there and call you names and bag on how you look?  Looks isn't everything.  You can walk by & see a beautiful girl or a handsome man, but I bet deep down, if you really got to know them, they would have a sucky attitude.  Their attitude makes them hideously ugly! 

I believe this video is a great video to show that a person is unique in some sort of way.  Hopefully people begin to realize this before they drive theirselves into the ground thinking they were never good enough from the start.